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| Latkes are my favourite! |
When I was a kid, I quit
Chanukah.
Chanukkah.
Hannukah.
Hanukkah.
However you spell it, I wanted
nothing to do with it.
I was about 9 years old when I
declared my disenchantment with the festival of lights. I told my Mom that I
wanted to celebrate Christmas instead, because all of my friends at school did.
I was one of only a handful of Jewish students in a small elementary school,
and I wanted to do what everyone else was doing. Naturally.
My Mom found this humorous. She
thoughtfully reminded me that I was born into the Jewish faith, and there was
not one thing wrong with that. She also told me that I was free to choose the
religion I wanted to subscribe to, and if I chose none at all, she would love
me all the same. She even took me to our local public library, so I could read
about the Jewish holidays, and the holidays of other faiths. If I was going to
make a decision, it was going to be an educated one. With colorful pictures and
huge print.
That year, I explored Christmas.
I read about the baby Jesus, the wise men, and the *gasp* Virgin Mary (Hey, I
was a kid!). I helped a classmate decorate her Christmas tree. I was pretty
much done with Chanukah. My family, however, continued to celebrate the
holiday. My Dad would help my brother hold the shamash as he lit the other
candles. They all said the prayer, as I sat at the kitchen table and didn’t
participate. They lit the candles, and then we all ate dinner together. When I
reached for the latkes, my mother smirked and jokingly said “Those are for Chanukah.” I scowled at
her. This went on for several nights. As
the holiday drew to a close, I approached my Mom to say I had changed my mind.
I wanted to be Jewish again.
She smiled at me and raised her
eyebrows when she asked me what had changed. She hugged me tightly when I said:
“I missed lighting the candles with you,
Daddy and Adam. I didn’t like being by myself.” And that’s how I learned
the most important thing about faith: Having faith, no matter where you stand
on the idea of religion, is about being with family, and never ever feeling
alone.
Although I’m not religious at
all, and often joke that I’m Jew-ish,
I have always had faith. I have always believed in family, and tradition, no
matter the format. In my home, there will be a menorah AND a Christmas tree, for
both me and Tyler. This weekend when I head to Trenton to visit his family, I’m
bringing the menorah my Mom got me for my first apartment in Toronto, and a bunch
of fancy candles to light. Lighting the menorah is how I stay connected to my
heritage, but mostly how I stay connected to my family and my childhood. It is
the only holiday I truly celebrate, because it reminds me of the freedom I was
given to choose, and to be my own person. And I also love latkes, and would eat
them every day if it were socially acceptable. With applesauce.
So to all of my Jewish friends, I
wish you a very festive and happy Chanukah. May your latkes be plentiful, and may
your dreidel games win you heaps of gelt.
To everyone who is reading
this (thank you!), Jewish and not:
May you always have faith in something. And let there always be family and friends to support you,
and remind you why just being YOU is enough.
Happy Holidays!
